One of the greatest joys of my life has been leading my three older kids into a relationship with Christ and baptizing them.

One of the greatest frustrations of my life is to watch my kids behave in ways that don’t honor the decision they’ve made.

To be fair, they are trying to live lives that honor God. They recognize sin in their lives and in their actions that they need to seek forgiveness for. And they are young; they haven’t had the opportunity to learn or experience life enough to form really solid habits in their Christian lives.

But on the other hand, I need to stop and realize that I cannot make those decisions for them. I can’t “force” my kids to be more faithful, more righteous, more spiritually mature.

And to be honest, that’s not completely my responsibility. It’s God’s.

My responsibility is to be faithful in my role as a parent, the charge God has given me over these specific children.

To be sure, I have the ability to help or hinder their spiritual growth. But I cannot grow it. Only God can do that.

For example, one of my boys had a rough day the other day. He was disrespectful to his mother, yelled at her, disobeyed her, and almost brought her to tears of frustration. When I got home and learned about it, he was very fearful of my reaction. He was confident his punishment was coming.

But my approach surprised him. I sat him down, explaining just how he’d made his mother feel, and showing him how his actions were inappropriate. Throughout our conversation and prayer together, I could sense God working on his heart. Shortly afterwards, he came downstairs in tears, reflecting on how he had treated his mother.

In that moment, I realized (again) that God can do more in my kids, growing and changing them to be more like him, than I ever can.

In that moment, I understood that I need to focus on my role, and be more faithful in guiding my kids into situation where God can work in them, instead of trying to do it all my self, which I can’t do anyway.

Dads, make sure you are focusing on your areas of responsibility as a parent, and try to spend less energy and worry on thos areas you aren’t responsible for and can’t control anyway.

In the end, it will serve to make you a better dad.

Be deliberate, Dad!

Do you tend to focus on areas that you shouldn’t, and over look the areas of responsibility you should be focusing on? You can leave your thoughts in the comments section below.