Hey Dads! I’m so glad you are here for Episode 13 of the DadCast!

Outside of your relationship with God, the relationship with your wife is the most important relationship that you have.

In the last episode of The DadCast, we discussed five things that you can do to prioritize that relationship and make it the best you can.

But that was just half of the list. There are at least five more ways that you can do this.

Digging into the next five ways to maintain and prioritize your relationship with your wife is what Episode 13 of The DadCast is all about!

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Episode Notes

DadCast Encouragement

In the last episode of The DadCast, we talked about how easy it is to get caught up in parenting, staying focused on the kids, and neglecting one of the most important relationships in your life, the relationship with your wife.

In order to be the best dad that you can be, you have to be the best husband that you can be. You have to prioritize your relationship with your wife. She needs you to be a great dad. But she also needs you to be a great husband. And the old saying is true: if mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy. If you want your family atmosphere to be great, one of your top priorities is to develop and maintain your relationship with your wife.

When you do this, the benefits are too numerous to count! You and your wife will start to see the marriage of your dreams, and others around you will notice as well.

This is a basic biblical principle. In Philippians 2, Paul talks about keeping your priorities right. He says in verses 3-4 “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.”

That’s the principle in play here, as well. When you place the needs and wants of your wife above your won, when you place her above you, you are showing here that she’s your priority. And you’re showing your kids that she’s your priority. That makes you a great dad, and an even better husband.

So let’s continue to talk about what it takes to prioritize and maintain the greatest relationship possible with your wife.

That is what Episode 13 of The DadCast is all about!

Dadhood Resource

• Love Busters by Willard F. Harley
• His Needs, Her Needs by Willard F. Harley

Other Resources mentioned in this episode of The DadCast

• Episode 12 of The DadCast
• Proverbs 31:10-31
• Philippians 2:3-4
• 1 Peter 3:1-7
• Genesis 1:27
• Ephesians 5:21-25

How To Be A Great Dad!

Here are the second five of ten ways I’ve found to improve and prioritize your relationship with your wife.

1. Respect your wife and the dignity of her value and worth
2. Listen to the needs of your wife
3. Be more than a spectator in the home
4. Share leadership in the home
5. Implement dating and romance in your relationship with your wife

Show Your Kids Today That You Love Them!

Here are some specific action steps you can take for each area.

Respect your wife and the dignity of her value and worth

• Listen to what’s going on in your wife’s life.
• Drop what you’re doing to help her with her needs when she asks you for something. It’s ok, you can come back to what your doing later. Her need is more important than the episode of Star Trek you’re watching anyway.
• Honor her publicly anytime you have the opportunity to do so.
• Communicate to your kids the value of the role your wife plays in your home and family.
• Give her some freedom in the decision making process in areas that concern the home and family.
• Give her the opportunity to have a “vacation” away from her role, just like you have a vacation from your job.
• Make a list. If your wife were permanently out of your life tomorrow, what would you miss about her?
• Read Proverbs 31’s description of a wife. Make a list of all the positive traits described here. Share with your wife how she fits that profile. Give her some praise.
• Help her accomplish her dreams and goals. Do you even know what those are? Make a point to find out.
• Show her you value her in the little things in life.

Listen to the needs of your wife

• She wants to see your care because of your interest.
• She wants to feel your closeness and love.
• She wants to know that you’ve heard her.
• Support your wife. Back her up in her authority with the kids.
• Respect your wife. She takes care of the kids, feeds the family, clothes the kids, and more. Show her some respect for doing these things.
• Give your wife affection. Physical touch, cards, flowers. These go a long way to communicating to your wife that you love her.
• Give her a break occasionally. Get a sitter so she can go out. Or you watch the kids so she can enjoy some time to herself.
• Listen to her. Hear what she says. Ask questions to make sure you truly understand where she’s coming from.
• Read the description in 1 Peter 3 of husbands and wives together. How does this describe your marriage? How can you improve?

Be more than a spectator in the home

• Change “I love you” statements to actions of love.
• Change your laziness and turn off the TV to help with the kids in the evenings. Help them with their homework. Read to them.
• Remember that the home reflects the personality of your wife. When you complain about the house, you’re complaining about her.
• Don’t procrastinate. When she asks for you to do something, get it done. Quickly.
• Take the initiative. Do things for her without being asked. Surprise her by helping out around the house.
• Set aside some time each month for projects that she needs done around the house.
• Set up an accountability relationship for this aspect of your life. Allow another man to ask you if you’re doing this.

Share leadership in the home

• Partner in leadership in the home with your wife.
• Stop and ask, are you struggling in this area of submission to one another?
• Read Ephesians 5 and compare this description to your marriage. How are you doing? Are you giving up and loving your wife without being demanding? Or are you allowing distance and coldness to grow?
• Listen to your wife. Ask her what changes you need to make to be the best husband you can be in this area.
• Seek help if you need it. Don’t be afraid to ask for professional help.

Implement dating and romance in your relationship with your wife

• Take a romantic getaway. Make it an overnighter if you can, at least once a year.
• Write notes to your wife.
• Make the time to date your wife, without the kids. She needs some alone time with you.
• Do things together that interest you both. Things such as biking, walking, and concerts are more fun when done together.
• Be sure to change your dating through the seasons of your marriage. When the kids are young, you may need to keep it shorter and closer than when the kids are older.
• Seek outside resources. There are a lot of resources on the web and in other formats that have some incredible ideas for dating your wife. Seek them out.

Summary Question

How do you prioritize your relationship with your wife?  What else would you add to this list of ten things? You can leave your thoughts in the comments section below.

Be deliberate, Dad!

 

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